Osselbot/src/index.js

#!/usr/bin/env node
// Load up the discord.js library
const Discord = require("discord.js");

// This is your client. Some people call it `bot`, some people call it `self`,
// some might call it `cootchie`. Either way, when you see `client.something`, or `bot.something`,
// this is what we're refering to. Your client.
const client = new Discord.Client();

// Here we load the config.json file that contains our token and our prefix values.
const config = require("./config.json");
// config.token contains the bot's token
// config.prefix contains the message prefix.


client.on("ready", () => {
  // This event will run if the bot starts, and logs in, successfully.
  console.log(`Bot has started, with ${client.users.size} users, in ${client.channels.size} channels of ${client.guilds.size} guilds.`);
  // Example of changing the bot's playing game to something useful. `client.user` is what the
  // docs refer to as the "ClientUser".
  client.user.setActivity(`${client.users.size} of you horrible people`,{ type: 'LISTENING' });
});

client.on("guildCreate", guild => {
  // This event triggers when the bot joins a guild.
  console.log(`New guild joined: ${guild.name} (id: ${guild.id}). This guild has ${guild.memberCount} members!`);
  client.user.setActivity(`${client.users.size} of you horrible people`,{ type: 'LISTENING' });
});

client.on("guildDelete", guild => {
  // this event triggers when the bot is removed from a guild.
  console.log(`I have been removed from: ${guild.name} (id: ${guild.id})`);
  client.user.setActivity(`${client.users.size} of you horrible people`,{ type: 'LISTENING' });
});
//osseley stop


client.on("message", async message => {
  // This event will run on every single message received, from any channel or DM.
	//people are assholes so this blocks it!
	if(message.content.toLowerCase().includes('osseley','nigger',"nigga","niglet","nigglet","lil adderal")){
		message.member.addRole('654366653093642241').catch(console.error);
	      message.member.removeRole('514254335425773589').catch(console.error);
		console.log(`${message.member} has been detained`)
		return message.reply('Member has been D E T A I N E D <:yikes:632660765878255636>')
	}
  // It's good practice to ignoe other bots. This also makes your bot ignore itself
  // and not get into a spam loop (we call that "botception ").
  	if(message.author.bot) return;

  // Also good practice to ignore any message that does not start with our prefix,
  // which is set in the configuration file.
  	if(message.content.indexOf(config.prefix) !== 0) return;

  // Here we separate our "command" name, and our "arguments" for the command.
  // e.g. if we have the message "+say Is this the real life?" , we'll get the following:
  // command = say
  // args = ["Is", "this", "the", "real", "life?"]
  	const args = message.content.slice(config.prefix.length).trim().split(/ +/g);
  	const command = args.shift().toLowerCase();

  // Let's go with a few common example commands! Feel free to delete or change those.

  	if(command === "ping") {
    // Calculates ping between sending a message and editing it, giving a nice round-trip latency.
    // The second ping is an average latency between the bot and the websocket server (one-way, not round-trip)
    	const m = await message.channel.send("Ping?");
    	m.edit(`Pong! Latency is ${m.createdTimestamp - message.createdTimestamp}ms. API Latency is ${Math.round(client.ping)}ms`);
  	}

  	if(command === "say") {
    // makes the bot say something and delete the message. As an example, it's open to anyone to use.
    // To get the "message" itself we join the `args` back into a string with spaces:
    		const sayMessage = args.join(" ");
		if (message.member.roles.some(r=>["Admin", "Mods","Member of the Order of the b l u e","Botmeister","Ally of the Order","say"].includes(r.name)) ){
			if(sayMessage.includes('@')) {
			return message.reply("\nStop pinging yourself \nStop pinging yourself");
		}
			// Then we delete the command message (sneaky, right?). The catch just ignores the error with a cute smiley thing.
			message.delete().catch(O_o=>{});
			// And we get the bot to say the thing:
			return message.channel.send(sayMessage);
		}
		else {
			return message.channel.send("Im sorry but we cant have nice things...")
		}
	}

  if(command === "kick") {
    // This command must be limited to mods and admins. In this example we just hardcode the role names.
    // Please read on Array.some() to understand this bit:
    // https://developer.mozilla.org/en/docs/Web/JavaScript/Reference/Global_Objects/Array/some?
    if(!message.member.roles.some(r=>["Admin", "Moderator","Member of the Order of the b l u e","Botmeister"].includes(r.name)) )
      return message.reply("Sorry, you don't have permissions to use this!");

    // Let's first check if we have a member and if we can kick them!
    // message.mentions.members is a collection of people that have been mentioned, as GuildMembers.
    // We can also support getting the member by ID, which would be args[0]
    let member = message.mentions.members.first() || message.guild.members.get(args[0]);
    if(!member)
      return message.reply("Please mention a valid member of this server");
    if(!member.kickable)
      return message.reply("I cannot kick this user! Do they have a higher role? Do I have kick permissions?");

    // slice(1) removes the first part, which here should be the user mention or ID
    // join(' ') takes all the various parts to make it a single string.
    let reason = args.slice(1).join(' ');
    if(!reason) reason = "No reason provided";

    // Now, time for a swift kick in the nuts!
    await member.kick(reason)
      .catch(error => message.reply(`Sorry ${message.author} I couldn't kick because of : ${error}`));
    message.reply(`${member.user.tag} has been kicked by ${message.author.tag} because: ${reason}`);

  }

  if(command === "ban") {
    // Most of this command is identical to kick, except that here we'll only let admins do it.
    // In the real world mods could ban too, but this is just an example, right? ;)
    if(!message.member.roles.some(r=>["Administrator","Member of the Order of the b l u e"].includes(r.name)) )
      return message.reply("Sorry, you don't have permissions to use this!");

    let member = message.mentions.members.first();
    if(!member)
      return message.reply("Please mention a valid member of this server");
    if(!member.bannable)
      return message.reply("I cannot ban this user! Do they have a higher role? Do I have ban permissions?");

    let reason = args.slice(1).join(' ');
    if(!reason) reason = "No reason provided";

    await member.ban(reason)
      .catch(error => message.reply(`Sorry ${message.author} I couldn't ban because of : ${error}`));
    message.reply(`${member.user.tag} has been banned by ${message.author.tag} because: ${reason}`);
  }

  if(command === "purge") {
  //Vibe check
	  if(!message.member.roles.some(r=>["Admin","Member of the Order of the b l u e","Botmeister"].includes(r.name)) )
	  return message.reply("Sorry, you don't have permissions to use this!");
  // This command removes all messages from all users in the channel, up to 100.
	  else {
  // get the delete count, as an actual number.
		  const deleteCount = parseInt(args[0], 10);

  // Ooooh nice, combined conditions. <3
		  if(!deleteCount || deleteCount < 2 || deleteCount > 100)
			  return message.reply("Please provide a number between 2 and 100 for the number of messages to delete");

  // So we get our messages, and delete them. Simple enough, right?
		  const fetched = await message.channel.fetchMessages({limit: deleteCount});
		  message.channel.bulkDelete(fetched)
			  .catch(error => message.reply(`Couldn't delete messages because of: ${error}`));
	  }
  };

  if(command === "detain") {
    //For Civilians all partying
    if(!message.member.roles.some(r=>["Admin","Member of the Order of the b l u e","Botmeister"].includes(r.name)) )
      return message.reply("Sorry, you don't have permissions to use this!");

    let member = message.mentions.members.first();
    if(!member)
      return message.reply("Please mention a valid member of this server");
	else {
		member.addRole('654366653093642241').catch(console.error);
	      member.removeRole('514254335425773589').catch(console.error);
		return message.reply("Member has been D E T A I N E D<:yikes:632660765878255636>\n**DEFCON** level increased\nGod Bless their souls")
	}
  }
  if(command === "retain") {
    //For Civilians all partying
    if(!message.member.roles.some(r=>["Admin","Member of the Order of the b l u e","Botmeister"].includes(r.name)) )
      return message.reply("Sorry, you don't have permissions to use this!");

    let member = message.mentions.members.first();
    if(!member)
      return message.reply("Please mention a valid member of this server");
	else {
		member.addRole('514254335425773589').catch(console.error);
	      member.removeRole('654366653093642241').catch(console.error);
		return message.reply("Member has been R E T A I N E D <:MilkTurtle:628399622678773760>")
	}
  }
	// HERE COMES SHITTY COMMANDS MADE BY YOURS TRUELY
	if(command === 'help') {
		return message.reply('https://technicolor.2a03.party/bot/');
	};
	if(command === "rand") {
		//Generates random number between 1-100
		min = Math.ceil(0);
  		max = Math.floor(101);
  		return message.channel.send(Math.floor(Math.random() * (max - min)) + min); //The maximum is exclusive and the minimum is inclusive
	};
	if(command === "oath") {
		return message.reply("The cadet oath is as follows.\nI pledge that I will serve faithfully in the Civil Air Patrol cadet program. That I will attend meetings regularly, wear my uniform properly, obey my officers, and advance my education and training rapidly to prepare myself to be of service to my community state and nation.");
	};
	if(command === "ask") {
		return message.channel.send("Dont Ask, Just ask!\n https://iki.fi/sol/dontask.html")
	};
	if(command === "damage") {
		return message.channel.send("https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/619631814696239142/678467158660874270/ohmydamage.mov")
	};
	if(command === "osseley") {
		return message.channel.send("Ohhh Osseley,\n how I missed you sooo much \nOne of these days...")
	};
	if(command === "psych") {
		return message.channel.send("Rules for finding a psychopath: \n1. Favorite color is orange \n2. Likes the left burners, worse if its top left\n3. Calls pizza sauce/tomato sauce gravy\n4. Doesnt like salad\n5. Likes country music\n6. Makes hot chocolate with water\n7. Likes black licorice")
	};
	if(command === "squad") {
		min = Math.ceil(0);
  		max = Math.floor(11);
  		let rate = Math.floor(Math.random() * (max - min) + min); //The maximum is exclusive and the minimum is inclusive
		return message.reply(`The squad rates this ${rate} out of 10`);
	};
	if(command === "magic") {
		return message.channel.send("Do you believe in magic in a young girl\'s heart\nHow the music can free her, whenever it starts\nAnd it\'s magic, if the music is groovy\nIt makes you feel happy like an old-time movie\nI\'ll tell you about the magic, and it\'ll free your soul\nBut it\'s like trying to tell a stranger bout \'rock and roll\'")
	}
	//DEFCON Roles
	if(command === "defcon") {
		//5 levels till ban
		if(!message.member.roles.some(r=>["Admin","Member of the Order of the b l u e","Botmeister"].includes(r.name)) )
		return message.reply("Sorry, you don't have permissions to use this!");
		else {
			let member = message.mentions.members.first();
			let role = 1;
			switch(args[1]) {
				case 5:
					role = message.guild.roles.find(role => role.name === `DEFCON 5`);
					member.addRole(role);
				break;
				case 4:
					role = message.guild.roles.find(role => role.name === `DEFCON 4`);
					member.addRole(role);
			    	break;
			  	case 3:
					role = message.guild.roles.find(role => role.name === `DEFCON 3`);
			  		member.addRole(role);
			  	case 2:
					role = message.guild.roles.find(role => role.name === `DEFCON 2`);
					member.addRole(role);
			    	break;
			  	case 1:
					role = message.guild.roles.find(role => role.name === `DEFCON 1`);
					member.addRole(role);
			    	break;
					default:
					message.reply("Defcon level not found please use 1-5");
					return;
				break;
			};
			client.channels.get("680243388695445587").send(`${member} has had their **DEFCON** level set to ${role} `)
			return message.reply("\n**DEFCON** level set!\nGod Bless their souls")
		};
	};
	if(command === "adderall") {
		switch(arg[0]) {
			case 1:
				return message.channel.send(">>> They call me lil adderall")
			case 2:
				return message.channel.send(">>> Second time being detained...I faked my death by having a fake seizure.......You know what they call me......Lil Adderall");
			case 3:
				return message.channel.send(">>> So note to self don’t ask those types of questions to Osseley...I’ve been detained 3 times they call me...lil adderall");
			case 4:
				return message.channel.send(">>> Alright I don’t know why I’m detained. I know all my detainments but not this one. But you know what they call me....you already guessed it........lil....adderall.");
			case 5:
				return message.channel.send(">>> rubs hands\nYou know ya boy I got detained ahaha aint big of a deal my pickup lines...eh....they aight and you know Oseley she don't like it. AYE AYE AYE..shout out to Ossley biggest inspiration. But guess what my league wont stop right there. So you already know it...aight... they call me lil adderall. \(I do have ADHD I do take it responsibly to those of you dont find it funny I like making jokes about it because I dont like it\)");
			case 6:
				return message.channel.send(">>> Aight..aight.. so you know stuff went down I was about to drop my new song “Osseley do you CAP with me” you know aight...rubs hands...and she don’t like it so I was like “aight”. Bro I swear to god she was like “I ain’t CAP’n with you”. BAM BAM. But you know what they call me.....Lil Adderall...");
			case 7:
				return message.channel.send(">>> Lil adderall alright so I'm going to keep on doin g these until I leave CAP and I am thinking of it right now. My last lil adderall will be emotional and osselot will want me so yeah. You know life is aight I got my dog and yeah.");
			case 8:
		 		return message.channel.send(">>> I really don’t know what I did, like last year I had depression and it was really bad. At school I would get threats and really get teased bad. I would be called numerous names because the things I did. At one point in life I really just became alone and do rowing constantly. At that time I took adderall (I have adhd I use it responsibly never abused it) that thing kept me real down and just constant day dreaming. At the year of 2018 I got hit by a car while on a crosswalk. I was going down hill and the driver signaled me that I could pass.I was going 8MPH and the driver pulled up when I was 5 feet away from him and I rolled over his hood. Than I fell down broke my thumb and sprained my wrist. Instead of helping me the driver looked at me and fled. No drivers stoped to see if I was ok and nothing. My chain was broken and I had to walk to school with a strapped bike on my backpack and my wheel popped from a screw. But what really got me interested was aviation. Being inhuman and flying above the clouds is despicable. Couldn’t find a relationship because of my ADHD I just do stuff like jumping off a dock with my clothes on and just really stupid stuff. All the stuff I do is legal. But somehow people that vape smoke do drugs get mad ho*s. I really haven’t saw that cute. Maybe one day I’ll get someone that understands.but you know what they call me.....li-..l......adderall.");
			default:
				return message.channel.send("No quote found");
		}
	}
});

client.login(config.token);